I hate you. You are fucking scum.
My friends and family can attest that it is incredibly hard for me to find hate for anyone. I’ve found redeeming qualities or had the empathy to understand the actions in almost everyone who has done me or anyone else wrong. There are notable exceptions of course such as; murderers, cheaters, people who harm children, and rapists.
Of course I have hate for you for the harm that you have done and the danger you pose to women. That’s right. The danger you pose. You see, you have acted. You have done serious harm to another and for that women will always have the right to hate and fear you. You were drunk, huh? Let me tell you something, Brock. I’ve been drunk many, many, many times. By the time I was your age and the age that you raped your victim I had been drunk many, many, many times. And from all of that experience what I can tell you is this; I have never, not once, seen anyone do anything drunk that their previous behavior, no matter how seemingly insignificant, hadn’t indicated was inside of them. In everyday conversation I’ve noticed their vengeful speak, their closeted bigotry, or their sadness that they think they are hiding. And for many, those low-key feelings surface with alcohol. So you are just going to have to come to terms that you are capable of rape, you do not find rape wrong, and that you are, in fact, a rapist. Every woman has the right to fear and hate you and I hope you live with that for the rest of your life.
As a man I have personal reasons to hate you. You have contributed to the narrative that I am an inherent monster. You make women afraid of me just because I am a man. You give me anxiety when I’m alone with a woman because I fear she fears that I might try to rape her. You make me fear men who are alone with the women I love or care for. You make me cry for the people who have to live a life tormented by your actions and the capabilities of people like you.
I’ve had several long-winded morality-based conversations about right and wrong and the human condition. I like to believe I have a strong morally-good compass. One that points to compassion and forgivness. But for people like you I cannot find any. I understand people are a product of how they were raised. And I have seen your fathers fucking empathy-seeking letter and I now understand, a little, how you became the piece of shit that you are today. But in my older age I’ve also become less-inclined to protect or find excuses for those who prey on the weak and vulnerable. I have no compassion for you. I can find no forgiveness for you. To me, as a human being, you are weak. You are a predator. You have attacked and my irrational first-response is that you should be put down.
My rational thoughts are not as cruel, perhaps. I find comfort that you will have to live your life labeled as a monster, I find comfort that your name and your crime has become viral, and I find comfort knowing that you are a shell of your former-self, that you don’t eat, and that you aren’t the boy your father once knew. You are the face of a disgusting crime and you deserve all of it.
I am thankful that your victim was strong enough to live and tell her story. That she endured your attack and your insulting attempts in court to clear your name. Maybe now, or one day in the future, you will understand just how strong she is. I don’t care how fucking fast you swim or what future you or your father think you have. You are a rapist. That is who you are and, hopefully, how you will be defined for the rest of your life. You can talk innocence all you want but your actions and your three felonies will always yell guilty over your attempts.
So I repeat. I hate you and you are fucking scum.